Am I ready?

I returned to KL last Monday with a heavy heart & an un-answered question - When am I ready to go home?

My heart sank when I saw bruises on dad's nose & his both knees. Dad fell 2 weeks ago. I felt bad to give him trouble. I thought a pet will be good to keep him company but he fell because he was trying to chase the dog back as she ran out to the road. I did called back home on the same day but he didn't tell me. I spoke to my neighbour as well but they too kept it from me. I hurt even more when my neighbour told me last Monday morning that dad fainted at home 3 months ago. Lucky they saw him fainted and rushed to his aid but dad insisted that he is alright.

How can these be happening? How can I not know? Dad has been keeping things from me & William. He always gives me the same answer each time I call home that everything is fine.

Dad is very happy to be at home, to live in a familiar place where he has friends & activities to pass time. He is not happy to live here with me as I sensed it when we brought him up here for a weekend. He was even more quiet and not feeling at home. I do not want to take away his happiness.

There are people around me advised me to look for a job back at home as I'm scouting for a job now but am I willing? The question came back to me again. I left it un-attended for quite some time as I wanted to lead my own life here. I have a home & a career. I gave myself 2 years to live in KL and now, it has been a good 4 years. How long more? It's not easy to sacrifice especially it involves in giving up the things that I want to do and my career. But at the same time, I want dad to be happy too.

Is it bad to choose my life or career after my family at the moment? I've been praying and to discern what God's plan for me. I'm helpless in this situation. I know I need space and I need to have faith in Him.