I want to be different

I recalled back in one of the Wednesday session, someone voiced out wanting to be different from others. It reminded me. I did have that thought of wanting to be different among the rest. I made it as my tagline after I graduated about nearly 5 years back, and dropping it off without realizing it.

It’s good to look back on the reason behind adopting “I want to be different” tagline and reason that I dropped off. I use to think that I’m the same old me, the same type of person which is no different from the humans that I see in my everyday lives. After graduate, you work. You work hard to achieve your gold and you save money. Then you will go for self improvement on the out-look, latest handphone, luxury car, entertainment and leisure, get a rich good looking partner, & married. I was asking myself is this the life that I want. It’s like a norm. When you reach at a certain age, it’s time to do certain things. I want to be out of the norm. I want to be different, to be somebody that stands out and to be someone outstanding. I want my life to be fast pace and exciting all the time.

I guess along the way in the working world, I can’t change to be out of the norm. It is part of circle of life. At a point of time, life is routine and I’m lost on my gold that I want to achieve and some are just hard to achieve. Wanting to be different is hard and the worldly materials just never fulfilled me. It was an awakening sign to me when I got in touch again with CSS friends that lead to Ignition Spiritual Exercises. It helped me to get back on my feet again on my faith life.

Thinking and dreaming so much of being different still made me the same person. Faith is the last thing on my mind. I learnt that I’m always different, different from the very beginning. God created me with His image. All humans are unique. I need to learn to appreciate myself, to know myself more and to accept myself. It is not a need to work so hard to make myself different so that others may look up to me. I am already different just by being myself, and God accepts me the way I am.